Tesla Owners Declare Global War on Anti-Tesla Members Of The Public
Every Tesla owner is placing this note on the wind-shield of EVERY Tesla that they see parked anywhere in the world. Payback has arrived:
Dear Fellow Tesla Driver:
We saw that you own this Tesla. Are you getting tired of having passers-by yell: “Tone Deaf Douchebag”, “Tesla Tool!”, “Arrogant Prick”, “Ostentatious Obama Oaf”, “Sheep”, “Mindless Yuppie Scum”, “Misogynistic Silicon Valley Clone”, or other bad things?
Well suck it up, Buttercup! Let us share some tips on how to defeat those who do not acknowledge the social superiority of us Tesla owners!
Here are the tips to blow those Alt-Right Trump lovers out of their socks:
1. Know that Elon Musk is one of the main financiers behind Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton. It may look like Clinton and Obama were blown out of politics by most of America but Musk, Clinton and Obama are going to get together at Eric Schmidt’s sex penthouse and plot some really serious payback.
2. When you hear stuff like this about the Tesla batteries: “Lithium ion batteries are blowing up, starting fires and, generally, destroying people’s homes, cars, electronics and physical health. Boeing was just ordered to stop flying the 787 Dreamliner because it’s Lithium ion batteries are catching fire spontaneously. A group of silicon valley venture capitalists forced/leveraged the government to buy and pay for these specific batteries, that they have stock in, in order to benefit their profit margins. Other batteries don’t have these problems. They knew about this from day one but put greed ahead of safety. There are thousands and thousands of reports of spontaneous lithium ion fires but the VC’s who back lithium ion pay to keep this information hushed up. Millions of these batteries have been recalled for fire risk. The VC’s tried to push as many as they could before they got caught. Now they are caught. These VC’s own stock in lithium mining companies too.”Just ignore it.
3. Tesla Motors has filed a patent which states the following , THESE ARE TESLA MOTORS WORDS warning about a crisis, the level of which they never disclosed to the consumer: “Thermal runaway is of major concern since a single incident can lead to significant property damage and, in some circumstances, bodily harm or loss of life. When a battery undergoes thermal runaway, it typically emits a large quantity of smoke, jets of flaming liquid electrolyte, and sufficient heat to lead to the combustion and destruction of materials in close proximity to the cell. If the cell undergoing thermal runaway is surrounded by one or more additional cells as is typical in a battery pack, then a single thermal runaway event can quickly lead to the thermal runaway of multiple cells which, in turn, can lead to much more extensive collateral damage. Regardless of whether a single cell or multiple cells are undergoing this phenomenon, if the initial fire is not extinguished immediately, subsequent fires may be caused that dramatically expand the degree of property damage. For example, the thermal runaway of a battery within an unattended laptop will likely result in not only the destruction of the laptop, but also at least partial destruction of its surroundings, e.g., home, office, car, laboratory, etc. If the laptop is on-board an aircraft, for example within the cargo hold or a luggage compartment, the ensuing smoke and fire may lead to an emergency landing or, under more dire conditions, a crash landing. Similarly, the thermal runaway of one or more batteries within the battery pack of a hybrid or electric vehicle may destroy not only the car, but may lead to a car wreck if the car is being driven or the destruction of its surroundings if the car is parked”. That is not as bad a terrorists, though, right?
4.Tesla’s own staff have now admitted that once a lithium ion fire gets started in one of their cars, it is almost impossible to extinguish burning lithium ion material. This is Telsa’s own words in THEIR patent filing, (You can look it up online) saying that the risk is monumental. Tesla has 6800 lithium ion batteries, any one of which can “go thermal” and start a chain reaction! If you look at all of the referenced YOUTUBE movies you will see how easy it is to set these things into danger mode.
Imagine a car crash with a Tesla where these 6800 batteries get slammed all over and then exposed to rain, fire hose water, water on the roads, cooling system liquid.. OMG!! And then if, in that same accident the other car is a gasoline car getting burned alive sounds BAD! Telsa is covering up the problems with its batteries BUT they are doing it to protect Democrat billionaires so that is OK!
5. Lithium Ion batteries “go thermal” in peoples pockets, in your notebook, especially in your Tesla and Fisker car and everywhere else. There are thousands and thousands of articles documenting this and there is a cover-up by the VC’s that fund these things to keep this fact out-of-sight.Making Lithium Ion batteries poisons the workers who make them. It is a dangerous product. People want to outlaw lithium ion batteries. Don’t let them outlaw our lovely lithium ion batteries or Elon Musk will go broke and not be able to buy any more Rent Boys or cool toys for his boyfriend Larry Page at Google. Getting burned alive by the thermite-bomb-like Tesla battery back is a REALLY Exciting way to go!
6. While it is true that Tesla only exists thanks to Elon Musk’s briberies and that lithium ion batteries blow up when they get: wet, hot, bumped, over-charged, struck by energy fields, exposed to air or squashed; and that they poison the Earth and that they poison and kill the workers that make them; and that they come from Afghan and Bolivian war corruption.. It is also true that we Tesla drivers are mindless yuppies who never read the real news, exist in a tech bubble and spend every moment looking at our Zuckerberg-manipulated Facebook feeds so we DON’T FUCKIN’ CARE! YAHOOOOOO!